


a kiss to keep him quiet

by andromedagalaxy



Series: Philkas College Verse [44]
Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Bottom Lukas, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 07:07:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12163959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andromedagalaxy/pseuds/andromedagalaxy
Summary: Philip squeezes his hand. “It’s gonna be fine.”“It’s over two months.”“It’s gonna be alright.”“It’s almostthreemonths.”Philip grins, chewing on his lower lip. “As if we’ll go more than two hours without speaking.”“The races should go on for like an hour and a half, so as soon as I get my phone from the locker I’m calling you.” He squeezes Philip’s hand this time and feels his heart in his throat. They’ve been so attached at the hip since everything happened, even more so since they moved in together. They haven’t been legitimately separated at all since they got the apartment, save for the few unfortunate cruise hours, and Lukas can hardly imagine it. Waking up in the morning to an empty bed. Spending days and days on end without seeing and touching the love of his life.(Lukas's 21st Birthday)





	a kiss to keep him quiet

Lukas dreams of the circuit. And not in the good way, like how Philip visits him in his mind, a shade of what he has in real life, something to look forward to when he wakes. No, this circuit shit feels like guilt, like worry, darkness rumbling through his head. He wants to do it, he’s signed up to do it, he’s _going to do it_ , but now it feels like it’s looming on the horizon because fall semester is essentially over. He’s not signed up for spring. They know he’ll be gone for a semester, he has to make up the credits in the summer. He’s going. He’s going. And Philip isn’t going with him. 

In his dream he’s running, running through fog and fear and the sounds of engines are surrounding him. He calls out for Philip but he can’t hear his voice, can’t tell if he’s replying, yelling back. They’re too far away. 

He feels something soft, those lips he loves so much on his shoulder. He knows he’s in between sleeping and waking, that silver sliver, and he just has to step off the precipice, let go.

“Lukas,” Philip’s voice whispers, and Lukas feels his lips again. He shifts a little bit and can feel their bed under his body, his stomach pressing into the mattress, the sheets bunched up around his calves. He shifts a little bit into the warmth of Philip’s embrace, feels Philip’s hand sliding across his back. “Lukas,” Philip says again.

“Mmm, baby,” Lukas says, groggy, the dream dying in his mind, the force of it still reverberating around his heart. He doesn’t know why this is coming at him now. They’ve talked about it, pretty clearly, but they haven’t gotten into panic mode yet. It’s December, he doesn’t even leave until March. He thinks he might be being pretty crazy. Philip will probably be fine. Taking his classes, taking jobs, taking care of Izzy.

Lukas tries to tell himself it’s only gonna be two and a half months. That they’re strong together, they’ll be strong no matter what.

But fuck, he’s gonna miss Philip.

“It’s your birthday,” Philip whispers, kissing Lukas’s earlobe. 

Lukas smiles a little bit, propping his face on his arm. “I know,” he says. They made out in the shower before bed last night and couldn’t stop talking about Lukas being able to walk into the liquor store and get a bottle of wine legally. They’ve been pretty good at getting alcohol through all of their friends despite the drinking age, but Lukas likes the idea of being able to bring Philip some drinks home without asking Nathan or Angela to help him. 

He hums a little bit and Philip keeps kissing him, running his tongue along the curve of Lukas’s shoulder. “Lemme make love to you,” Philip whispers, and the words sink in Lukas’s gut and suddenly he’s warm all over. He’s already in the perfect position and he can’t think of anything he wants more right now than to have Philip on top of him, all over him, inside him. He wants to feel him.

“Yes,” Lukas breathes, closing his eyes, a shiver running through him. “God, yes Philip.”

Philip makes a happy little noise and Lukas leans a little bit to one side to he can kiss him, their tongues sliding together. Philip traces his hand down Lukas’s back, kissing across his cheek and his shoulders. “Twenty one years old,” Philip whispers, and Lukas can feel him smile against his skin. “I’m gonna take such good care of you.”

“You been planning this?” Lukas says, his voice a little raspy already, his body trembling at the way Philip is touching him, reaching down to palm at his ass. 

“I’m always planning this,” Philip says, throwing one leg over him, rutting against his hip. “It’s really hard with you around, babe. I just wanna jump you all the time.”

Lukas laughs and it comes out in a short breath when Philip nips at his earlobe. “Just like when you first saw me?”

“You mean when you were following me around trying to figure out how to ask me to take pictures for you?” Philip asks, and Lukas’s skin goes hot. Philip chuckles and presses a long kiss to his cheek.

“Yeah,” Lukas says. “Then.”

“You get sexier every day, Waldenbeck,” Philip says. He breathes hot against Lukas’s ear and lowers his voice to a whisper. “I’m gonna open you up with my tongue.”

“Fuck,” Lukas breathes, his body shuddering. He shifts a bit and changes the position of his arms, bracing his forehead on his left forearm, his right hand beside his head. He feels Philip kissing down his back, straddling his left side as he moves lower. He centers himself better, his legs on either side of Lukas’s, and Lukas can never be ready for this, having Philip’s mouth down there. It’s different than when he blows him, still more intimate even now after all these years, all these times. When he thinks about how well Philip knows his body Lukas sucks in a breath, squeezing his eyes shut tight. He’d never let anyone else touch him like this. Because he wouldn’t want to, because Philip is his one and only. Because no one could ever do it the way Philip does it. 

Lukas has never felt love like this.

Philip traces his fingers over lines the sheets have pressed into Lukas’s skin and noses at his lower back. Lukas trembles and lets out a harsh breath, closing his eyes, and he used to feel stupid when Philip would lavish him like this, like he should be doing something, but after everything he just knows when Philip wants to make him feel good. And it makes him feel good that Philip gets such pleasure in him, in his body, how he looks and how he feels.

“Philip,” Lukas whispers, without meaning to. 

“God, Lukas, you’re so…” and he’s kissing him again, kissing his back and his thighs, and before Lukas knows it Philip is spreading him apart and diving in. He doesn’t go slow, probing with his tongue, and Lukas sucks in a breath, turning his face into the mattress.

“Fuck, fuck,” Lukas breathes, groaning as Philip keeps working him, fingers digging into his ass. Lukas presses back against Philip’s mouth and cries out when he feels a dry finger push in alongside Philip’s tongue. Lukas feels like he’s on fire and he makes the mistake of thinking about how Philip is gonna be fucking him soon and almost feels like he’s gonna come on the spot just picturing it. Every time it turns him on so bad—he feels so vulnerable, so full, so completely and perfectly content to belong to Philip like this every day for the rest of their lives.

Philip pulls his tongue out and kisses Lukas’s hole, breathes hot there and keeps fingering him, gentle but so sure and purposeful at the same time. “God, baby, look at you,” Philip says, and Lukas realizes then that he’s thrusting down into the bed, periodically pushing back into Philip’s finger.

“Your mouth,” Lukas gasps. 

“My mouth?” Philip asks. “You want my mouth back, huh?”

Lukas moans, so dizzy, so hot. “God, yes, ugh—”

Philip laughs a little bit and it’s the sexiest goddamn thing Lukas has ever heard. He loves when Philip knows he’s in control, never taking advantage but always giving Lukas exactly what he wants and needs. “Yes, baby,” he whispers, and his tongue slides in alongside his finger again.

Lukas pants, moans and writhes, knows he could probably come from this and this alone, but Philip can always tell when he’s close and he pulls back amidst Lukas’s mindless protests, tightness swirling in his stomach. Lukas buries his face in the pillow and tries to contain himself, but he’s sweating and he can barely see straight. He can hear the snick of the lube bottle and he thrusts a little bit down into the bed, want surging through his veins. He knows Philip is touching himself, smearing the lube all over his cock, and the thought drives Lukas wild.

Only Philip can get him this way.

“You want it like this?” Philip asks, rubbing his hands up and down Lukas’s back. “Yeah, baby?”

“Yes, Philip,” Lukas breathes. “Please, c’mon, c’mon I need you—”

Philip leans down and kisses Lukas’s shoulder blades. “Arch up a little bit.”

Lukas does and he feels Philip grab one of their pillows, inching it under Lukas’s pelvis so his hips are raised a little bit. Philip gets on top of him and the weight of him is so fucking hot, familiar, and he rubs his cock against Lukas’s ass, not pushing into him yet, just teasing. 

“Babe,” Lukas breathes, twisting the sheets in his hands. “Please.” Desperation fucking clings to him.

“Yeah, it’s your birthday,” Philip says, kissing the back of his neck. He lines himself up and starts pushing inside, holding Lukas by the hips. Every time they do it this way Lukas feels everything well up inside him, all the lust and love he feels, and sometimes it dwarfs him because it’s all Philip, all of it, all the good feelings in his chest and his mind and his heart.

Philip pushes in until he’s pressed against him, completely covering him, and Lukas’s whole body feels tight. He gasps, groaning, his heart slamming against his chest. The pain and pleasure race up and down his legs, go to war in his gut, make him keen with desire.

“Okay?” Philip asks, so close, right next to his ear. 

“Yes,” Lukas says, his voice breaking.

“You sure, Lukas?” Philip asks, brushing Lukas’s hair aside so he can see him better.

“Yes, yes,” Lukas whispers, everything aching, everything, but in the best fucking way. “Please—God, Philip, please—”

“Slow,” Philip says. “Slow, just how you deserve it.”

And that’s what he gives. Long, deep strokes that wring out shuddering moans and little whimpers and make Lukas sound like something dying and broken, something gasping and vulnerable in the throes of ecstasy. Philip wraps one arm around Lukas’s waist and braces the other on the mattress as he thrusts into him, breathing hot against the back of his neck.

Lukas knows he’s fucking drooling into the pillow under his head, leaking all over the pillow under his hips but he couldn’t be fucking happier. Philip tugs on his hair a little bit and Lukas grins, breathing in harsh pants. Philip shifts and makes the angle better, and Lukas feels like he’s gonna pass the fuck out when Philip leans over Lukas’s shoulder and brings their mouths together. He licks into Lukas’s mouth and Lukas sucks on his tongue, desperate to taste him, to consume him, to be consumed. 

“You feel good, Lukas?” Philip asks, thrusting slow and sure. “You feel good?”

“So fucking good,” Lukas moans. “God, the fucking best, babe, your cock is the fucking best—”

Philip laughs and Lukas knows he’s babbling but it’s fucking true. He reaches back and grabs onto Philip’s ass, feeling every movement, urging him faster, closer, more, more. They’re both so sweaty and they slide together, Philip biting and licking at Lukas’s neck. He jerks forward and Lukas gasps, feels Philip tighten his hold on him.

“Lukas,” Philip whispers, lips plastered against Lukas’s jaw.

“Baby,” Lukas chants, his body trembling, his pleasure building, his thighs shaking as Philip’s pace stutters but doesn’t slow. “Baby, baby, my baby.” His erection is so fucking painful and he knows he’s gonna blow any second, absolutely fucking wrecked by this ethereal angel surrounding him, inside him. 

“Your baby,” Philip gasps. “I love you. I love you so—so much, Lukas, so much, so much—”

“I love you,” Lukas moans. “You, you, only you—”

“Lukas, God, you’re so—”

“I’m close,” Lukas gasps, gripping Philip’s ass, his muscles straining, heat and longing swarming in his gut, in the spot where they’re joined.

“Come for me,” Philip groans, his arm around Lukas’s waist tightening even more. “Come on, baby, wanna make you come—”

And Lukas has no time to really think about it, not at all before his orgasm overtakes him. Philip fucks him through it, making these little wanton, satisfied noises, and then Lukas feels him buck forward, burying his face in Lukas’s neck as he floods him. It’s the most incredible feeling, another reminder of how this is theirs, no one else’s. No one will ever know him like Philip.

“Jesus Christ,” Lukas whispers, a little sure for a minute that he’s having a heart attack. “God, Philip.”

They lay like that for a couple moments, silent save for their breathing. Philip kisses the back of Lukas’s neck once, twice and again before pulling out as easily as he can and crashing down beside him. “Good start to your birthday?” Philip asks, kissing his shoulder as he cards his fingers through Lukas’s hair.

“Uh, fuck yeah,” Lukas says, grinning, still trying to come back to life. He eases onto his side with a good amount of creaking and groaning, scooting over and pressing a long kiss to Philip’s forehead.

~

Philip’s exam doesn’t take very long by some sort of miracle, so when Lukas gets out of his last test before break Philip is already outside waiting for him. They walk over to that riverside restaurant under the Brooklyn Bridge that’s way too expensive, and Lukas insists that he pay for them, despite Philip’s protests.

He presents his ID to the waitress and laughs when Philip takes a picture of him doing it, and as soon as he gets his glass of wine he hands it over to share. 

“So I think,” Philip says, over dessert, “that I’m probably gonna come visit you like twice, when you’re gone.”

Lukas’s heart rattles a little bit and he swallows hard. 

“I can leave Izzy with Angela, and just come on the weekend so I don’t miss any class.”

Lukas makes a little noise and takes another bite of their tiramisu.

“Lukas, you should be excited,” Philip says, reaching out and taking his hand that’s resting on the table. “It’s gonna be awesome. You’re gonna travel, you’re gonna win all the damn races, you’re gonna get prize money.”

“When I get back I’m gonna take you out to a dinner that’s a lot fancier than this,” Lukas says, meeting Philip’s eyes.

Philip laughs, incredulous. “Fancier than this? This is probably the most expensive place we’ve ever been to. I mean—we’re right under the bridge. We’re on the river. Look at the view!”

Lukas doesn’t stop looking at him. He knows the beautiful city is out the window to their left but the most beautiful thing in the world is right in front of him. “When I get back I’m not gonna wanna let go of you.”

Philip squeezes his hand. “It’s gonna be fine.”

“It’s over two months.”

“It’s gonna be alright.”

“It’s almost _three_ months.”

Philip grins, chewing on his lower lip. “As if we’ll go more than two hours without speaking.”

“The races should go on for like an hour and a half, so as soon as I get my phone from the locker I’m calling you.” He squeezes Philip’s hand this time and feels his heart in his throat. They’ve been so attached at the hip since everything happened, even more so since they moved in together. They haven’t been legitimately separated at all since they got the apartment, save for the few unfortunate cruise hours, and Lukas can hardly imagine it. Waking up in the morning to an empty bed. Spending days and days on end without seeing and touching the love of his life.

“Listen, it’s gonna be fine,” Philip says. “I’m gonna visit you, we’re gonna talk every day, we’ll facetime, you can see Izzy—it’ll be fine.”

Lukas blows out a breath.

“Anyway, don’t think about it right now because I know it weirds you out,” Philip says. He digs his spoon into the tiramisu and holds it out. “Open.”

Lukas smiles at him and opens his mouth, letting the spoon in. He savors the bite, watching as Philip uses the same spoon to dig out a piece for himself. “Tastes good,” Lukas says, playing with Philip’s fingers, turning his wrist over to look at the tattoo.

“You taste better,” Philip says, smirking up at him.

Lukas nearly chokes. “Babe, you’re dirty,” he says. “We’re in public. A respectable place.”

“Yeah, I have a feeling we’re not gonna be very respectable when we get home,” Philip says. “Once we stop by the liquor store.”

Lukas raises his eyebrows. “Oh yeah,” he says. “What happens in our own apartment is a different story.”

~

Lukas spends a hundred dollars on alcohol and tries not to feel too stupid about it. But he’s not feeling so stupid as soon as they get home and start making those peach drinks in the blender, which makes Izzy bark for about a hundred years, as per the norm. 

The tequila hits them fast, then it’s down, down, down until they’re pushing the couch against the other wall and trying to rearrange the TV. 

“No, no,” Lukas slurs, his eyes jumpy and his Philip-vision in full effect. God the most beautiful thing. “No,” he says, grinning. “Looks stupid.”

Philip braces his hand on his hip and narrows his eyes. “You wanted this,” he says, gesturing to the couch, which is half in the corner of the room, diagonal and sitting on top of their rug.

“I know,” Lukas giggles. “I’m stupid.”

“Yes,” Philip says, walking over and grabbing his hand. He tugs him down onto the couch and pats the space beside them, watching as Izzy jumps up and spins around, panting and smiling at them. “Good birthday?” Philip asks, looking at Lukas.

“Happy birthday,” Lukas says. “Not good.”

Philip grins, climbing into his lap and pressing their chests together as he buries his face in Lukas’s shoulder. Izzy quickly fills in the space Philip left behind and rests her face on Lukas’s leg. “Are you having one?” Philip asks.

“A birthday?” Lukas asks, his mind a sea of tequila and beautiful Philip.

“A good one!” Philip exclaims, in a haze of laughter. 

“Oh. Yes,” Lukas says, definitively. “Every day with you is a good day.”

“Even when I kick you in my sleep?” Philip asks, muffled. 

Lukas scratches Izzy’s head and rubs Philip’s back at the same time, sort of amazed at himself for being able to do both. “Yes,” he says. “Even when you punch me on purpose because my snoring woke you up.”

“I hardly ever do that,” Philip says, pulling back a little bit so Lukas can see his beautiful face. “I’m proud of you.”

“Why?” Lukas says. “I didn’t do anything ever important.”

Philip scoffs and smacks him a little bit. Lukas grins, pulling him closer, and for a minute when he rocks down it feels so damn good. Lukas knows he’s probably got a stupid look on his face but fuck Philip is hot. It’s his birthday and he’s so lucky because he’s holding the most beautiful kind perfect creature in his arms.

“For everything,” Philip says. “But the Dean’s List. You’re gonna definitely be on it.”

“Ah,” Lukas says, pride swelling through his chest. “Yes. Smart. Smart like you for once. Solid. Savage.”

“Gabe sounded like he was crying when I told him,” Philip laughs. “So proud.”

Lukas tries to dig in his mind. “I told Dad and Sarah was there and she said she was so proud too.” There’s a latent kind of fear that comes with mentioning her in front of Philip, a fear that presents itself like a storm cloud when Lukas is so drunk like this. He’ll never forget how he acted on the cruise ever. He hasn’t had a drink alone since.

“She’s a nice lady,” Philip says. 

“I know,” Lukas says. He tries not to think too hard on it, because it still isn’t his favorite thing. And with the storm of fear he feels the anxiety of leaving surge forward too. He groans a little bit, pouting, and pulls Philip closer, close as he can get. “Come here,” Lukas whispers, wrapping his arms around Philip’s middle. Philip starts kissing Lukas’s face, his cheek and his temple and his forehead and the corner of his mouth.

“I got you that book you wanted,” Philip whispers, and Lukas can’t even remember. “I got you a framed picture of us with our anniversary date engraved.”

Lukas laughs a little bit. “Are you telling me all my gifts?”

“I got you that dirt bike performance kit thing,” Philip keeps going, still kissing him. 

“Stop telling me all of them,” Lukas says, turning towards Philip’s affections, sliding his hands down to tug at the hem of his shirt.

“I think when you go I’m gonna get another tattoo for you,” Philip says, leaning back again to look at him.

Lukas narrows his gaze. “Without me?”

“So you can see it when I visit,” Philip says. 

“Of what?” Lukas asks.

“Not sure yet,” Philip says.

“Where?”

“Not sure,” Philip says, tilting his head.

Lukas reaches up and drags his thumb along Philip’s lips because he can’t resist them. He really feels like he’s floating, his senses going haywire. Tattoos in hidden places. Philip in pain in a tattoo parlor alone. Philip alone period. For almost three months.

“I really don’t wanna leave you,” Lukas says, vaguely hearing Izzy starting to snore. “Like at all. Like it makes me sick to think about it. And with that shithead living just a couple doors down—”

Philip scoffs, waving the idea off. “He’s fine, he’s been quiet lately, he’s terrified of Nathan.”

“We can’t get him kicked out unless he physically does some shit and I can’t have that, baby,” Lukas says, tears already gathering in his eyes, worry clawing at him. “Like, I can’t, if he touches you I’m gonna fly right back and beat him to fucking death.”

“Lukas,” Philip whispers, and then he smashes their mouths together. Lukas knows it’s a kiss to keep him quiet but he melts into it anyway, closing his eyes and smoothing his hand over Philip’s hip. It’s intense, like they’re inside a fireball, and then Philip pulls back. “It’s fine,” he whispers. “Helen and Gabe are gonna come stay with me a couple times. I’ll be taking classes, taking jobs. He’s not gonna do anything to me.”

“He better not.”

“He won’t.”

Lukas sighs. “Then I’ll be taking classes in the summer and you won’t and that’s stupid.”

“Maybe I’ll take one or two fun ones,” Philip says. “But just imagine…on days where I don’t work I’ll just be waiting here for you naked. Touching myself and thinking of you.”

Lukas’s eyes flutter shut. “That just makes me want to be home.”

Philip giggles and kisses him again. “More drinks, birthday boy. Pie in the fridge.”

Lukas looks at him, the light hitting him a little differently because of how they moved the couch. “I gotta write you another letter,” he says. “You look good in this light.”

He knows he’s said something stupid as soon as Philip’s brows furrow. He tells his drunk mind that the letters are a goddamn secret! For after he proposes! What the fuck!

“Nothing,” Lukas says preemptively, before Philip can open his mouth.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Lukas says, heart beating wildly. “Izzy!” he yells, startling her. “Wake up!” She looks back at him and huffs.

“Write me a letter?” Philip says, blinking. “Another—your notebook—”

“Nothing and no one!” Lukas declares, standing up and taking Philip with him, hand splayed out on his lower back as the two of them stumble to their feet. “More drinks angel face.”

“Lukas—”

“Nope.” He waddles them into the kitchen, barely avoiding slamming into the bar stool.

Philip laughs then, still pressed against him as they make it to the counter, Izzy following behind them. “You—You—”

“Nothing about me,” Lukas says, wincing. “I’m stupid.” He’s spoiling his fucking surprise and he’s so annoyed but hopefully neither of them remember this tomorrow.

“I love you,” Philip says, pressing a long kiss to Lukas’s neck. “I love you, I love you.”

Lukas tips Philip’s chin up and kisses him full on, as hard and meaningful as he can manage in his current state. “I love you,” he breathes against Philip’s lips. “And I can’t wait to marry you.”

“Mmm, soon?” Philip asks, hands pressed against Lukas’s chest.

“Don’t know,” Lukas says, even though his mind keeps screaming out _right before summer classes start right before summer classes the weekend before the weekend before._

He mentally kicks himself. No more spoiling secrets, dummy.

“Okay,” Philip says, looking him up and down, before he promptly drops to the floor. For a second Lukas is terrified he’s passed out or something, but then he sees him cuddling up to Izzy, dragging her into a welcome embrace. She starts licking his face and Lukas grins, taking his phone out of his pocket and dropping it onto the rug before he can take his intended picture. 

Philip laughs, reaching over and grabbing it, quickly typing in Lukas’s password. “I got you,” he says. “Selfies.”

“Thanks babe,” Lukas says.

“Say Happy Birthday to Daddy, Izzy!” Philip says, holding out his phone. 

“Daddy’s gonna make some more drinks,” Lukas says, swaying and narrowing his eyes at himself and the nickname. “No, I hate it.”

“I like it!” Philip says. 

“No, no, no.”

Philip laughs and Lukas grins, shaking his head and he slowly, very slowly, pulls the blender forward. 

“Maybe we drink the ciders so you don’t have to do the blender anymore, huh babe?” Philip asks, looking up at him.

Lukas points down in his direction, winking at him. “Thank you for sparing me.”

Philip blows him a kiss and Lukas catches it, smacking it onto his cheek. He wavers over to the fridge, warmth blooming all over, and he doesn’t think about going away. He just thinks about being back, afterwards. Bending down on one knee on the top of the Empire State Building and asking the most incredible person in the world to marry him.

He laughs to himself as he opens the fridge, pulling out two bottles of cider. 

“What?” Philip asks, still snapping pictures of himself and Izzy.

“Nothing,” Lukas says, grasping for the bottle opener, moving over to sit down. “Just love you.”

Philip grins. “I love you too.”

And no birthday present has ever been better than that.


End file.
